what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
