K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Please, let me fuck your mom
I think my fart just growled at me.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
