well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
