therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
