I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
