I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
