Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize