My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
