Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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