Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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