ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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