:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
