The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
