theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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