I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
