She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
