there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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