I look better un-naked...
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
