I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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