Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
