OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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