Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
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