my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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