Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I am mentally ready for anal.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
