If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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