Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
it's like iHOP with fire
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
