Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize
