Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
