Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
