She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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