Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
