This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
