ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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