it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
