Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
