I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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