My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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