dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
