Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
