Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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