Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(985): View more from Louisiana

I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.

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(913): View more from Kansas

I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me

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(256): View more from Alabama

My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.

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(219): View more from Indiana

Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role

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(951): View more from California

I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.

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(954): View more from Florida

Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.

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(917): View more from New York City

I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball

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(770): View more from Georgia

His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis

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(585): View more from New York

He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.

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