You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
