what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
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