"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
