He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
