Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize