Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize