they need to just BURY HIM!
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Randomize
