Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I need a beard to bite.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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