No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
