i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
should my penis look like a turkey
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
What a dumb baby whore.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
